In love and feelings parenthesis do not apply.
“An interlude or interval”, definition by Lexico, powered by Oxford.
We use parentheses to enclosure a thing in our living expressions and reasoning. We learn that since school, math class. They teach us that anything inside have to be solved first, is an equation or problem inside other. Took it to living is when people try meet and deal with problems without affecting their main lives. Is abused in relationships terms. We listen, read and learned that in a relationships if something take a bad turn you need space. Space to think and soak in the solutions for that problem keeping a safe distance from the other side of the relationship.
Put it this way, is like asking for a parenthesis for the feelings you have for that other person. Some cases both sides understand that and accept it, and goes in that space between reality and self-appraisal. Results, ending relationships in a long, mid, and short term. Not everybody handles it the same way. People lock themselves into their own minds, not accepting any help from anybody. Meanwhile, others open themselves to their friends or look for help. Choice goes from every kind and perspective. It’s a hard situation, it happened when something is wrong.
Love, it doesn’t have parenthesis, you love all the time during the healing and bleeding process. Sometimes it seems like we forget about, it’s there inside your heart, while that heart is beating that love will be alive. During hard times seems to fade away, it still there, is part of a process to getting stronger. It’s not easy, it may look impossible, to ask love to stop feeling for a while establishing an emotional parenthesis. Locking up memories, routines, sensations, details, smells, and stimulus that make love be there present.
This time, this parenthesis, is accompanied by the pain acknowledge when you love that person more than you ever imagine. That make you understand that you’re ready to give everything for that person, no matter what. You stop thinking about yourself, you get focused on the efforts you can make to get it back. No matter the distance and parenthesis that person ask for, the nature of love make us to take action. Bringing you to give everything for her or him. You want that person to know that in the most obscure and difficult moment of their lives they are being loved.
“Love is of all passions the strongest, for it attacks simultaneously the head, the heart, and the senses.” -Lao Tzu
We all feel love, had good and bad relationships. You know you love somebody and everything changes for you, and if that person loves you back is the most incredible feeling you can have. Not always goes as you plan or like, you need to be prepared for everything. You notice that something is affecting your relationship face it as soon as possible. It will forbid unneeded pain and uncomfortable situations. Asking for distance and time create that parenthesis I’m talking about, this is not a real choice. Is a torture for someone that loves you, is unaccepted. You know you have a problem talk about it, no matter how long do you have to do it. When you love, with all your heart, don’t have a certain amount for trying. You keep it going, change approaches, tactics, strategies, but do not give up. If you give up you certainly not love the other person they way you think, you get frustrated, but it’s never too late.
Before you ask for a parenthesis in your relationship put this thought in your mind: how much do I love this person? I understand what it will face in this time? Do you are leaving a window open for communication? There exist a possibility that the relationship will continue? It’s worth it? At the time you found out your solutions, you will love that person the same way or more?
The moment you start to answer those questions you will know what you want. If you answer one of does questions with a “No”, let me tell you that you’re creating a trilogy of torture to that person. You will break their heart, put a distance between the two of you, and you will run away from answering questions by giving excuses that help yourself. Be brave, realistic, strong, and honest. Tell them you don’t feel the same way, that your love is in jeopardy. Being honest is the best gift you can give to someone that loves you. As quick, you say the truth, quicker the wounds will heal. They will understand that they have to keep going without you, and change their future life.
Hey! I’m not telling you it will be an easy task, you will have a better ending to your relationship. Possibly they keep you as a friend, you never know. Be honest, don’t lie so you don’t get hurt. Break-ups are not a competition of who suffers more, but you need to understand that if that person still loves you with their heart and you don’t, the hard part will be on their side.